There's a whiff of the "Harry Potter" franchise in Kirov.

      Today, besides homemade wonders that supposedly add "special tourist attractiveness" to the regional center—such as the Gates of the Russian North, which, judging by their quality of construction, were built simultaneously with the road to the Klondike, the Rotunda, which has lost its historical significance but gained gynecological charm in the form of the "Simakov slit," and the monument to Alexander Nevsky, which has not been officially registered and is affectionately called "Macedonian" by locals—Kirov received access to an analog of the Harry Potter platform nine and three-quarters, available freely and openly.

      By the way, anyone interested can repeat the short journey to "Kirov’s Platform 9 3/4" using Newsler.ru, starting from Dzerzhinsky Street and heading into the "Ganin settlement" along Central Street. On the left side of the route, you will personally see about a dozen degrees of readiness of passages through the "portal"—from initial to nearly completed construction—and can try to pass through, bringing along an owl cage or a shopping cart for a full experience of being a young wizard. Although a shopping bag, a school backpack, or a stroller with a baby will also suffice.

      However, if you strictly follow the Harry Potter instructions to cross the platform—run up, courageously pass through the pillar, and appear on the other side—it is recommended to use the "call an ambulance in advance" feature.

      On Central Street, perhaps in accordance with the previously approved project, sidewalk repairs are underway—too narrow to be considered normal (it’s no easier for two sturdy pedestrians to pass each other than to squeeze through the corridor of a passenger train), but mandatory due to the very active traffic and the rare observance of fast-driving by car owners (which is probably considered normal among cottage owners). At the same time, on the "poor sidewalk scope"—right in the middle of the path—stand poles... No, not trees, which can be cut down by embedding stumps in the asphalt, but proper electrical poles taking up three-quarters of the pedestrian space.

      Particularly "touching" is the section of the sidewalk opposite the kindergarten, where the number of parents with strollers should frighten anyone except municipal officials and traffic police officers, who are probably genetically lacking imagination and empathy, as it is obvious that transporting small children is only possible along the road shoulder.

      Because attempting to use the sidewalks involves only "lethal options": gracefully, especially for women, dragging the stroller over the curb to end up back on the road and under the wheels; or, after conquering the curb on the other side, falling into the impassable roadside bushes. The third option—raising the stroller above the head with incredible arm strength—immediately brings to mind a funeral procession.

      Probably, the owner of the fantastic franchise that allows copying and creating a unique "platform" with public funds is Vyacheslav Simakov himself, trusting the execution of the "repair contract" to JSC "GDMS" under the patronage of the Municipal Budgetary Institution "Department of Improvement."

      Thanks to the efforts of both municipal structures, everyone—indeed, not just Kirov residents but also visitors—can assess, not in a movie, but in real life and the present time, the idea of J.K. Rowling (author of the Harry Potter books, ages 12+)—which, besides local officials, no one in the world could have conceived of. Even the organizers of the "Harry Potter Magic World" amusement park in Orlando, Florida, might nervously smoke aside, dreaming of working for the Kirov city administration, where "crazy fanaticism" not only goes untreated but is actively encouraged.